On Death's field

Bright surprise
In your eyes
Twilight trying to escape
this graveyard
where shards
of this life lay and
you can try but
it's all done
closing 'round the dimming sun

Memories meander
through those holes
in your soul
and you
sit and watch around
at all that's lost and found
And taste the sweet sweet pain
of death in your pockets

-Saakshi sharma

Strange Love

The sun could not have been shining brighter that day as i lugged my beat soul through the lone meadow that noon. There were waves of unnamed unexperienced emotions that loomed around, coming in flashes and then disappearing just as fast as they had come. 

No huts, no sign of life around that day save for one withered stand-alone tree. The tree had seen much come and go. It knew. Unimaginable things, things that could make men shudder, fall to heir knees and cry, and then those that soothe wailing babies at night. It was calling me unto, so i gave in submissively and began to walk towards.

My eyes fell upon what i thought was a mirage. No, not those that erupt of sands but of flesh and blood. My gaze was transfixed on him. It wasn't his hazel eyes that drew me to him, that left me in limbo - it was thouse things that they held, secrets, power, nurturance, answers and those things that are and will be unknown to the world. 

and in that moment, i knew that everything i had done up until then was meaningless, like my existance without him was incomplete. 

He smelled of spring and evertything that it brings along with it - flowers in full bloom and mildly dampened earth.

That moments when our eyes met, i knew that his had penetrated my soul and had already visited every single cell of my existance because i had done the same and with those eyes alone there were no parts of our bodies and souls left untouched. This encounter was not of chance, it was meant to be. There would be a black hole in the universe, if for some reason, this were to not happen, because our entire lives lead just up to this. No one had to speak. We walked towards the tree in silence. We knew what was to be done and almost as a divine sign or to leave us to our solitude, the sun dipped behind the dense clouds. It was a moment where darkness and light met. 

He was my Shiva, and I, his Shakti. Like lost pieces of one whole, finally coming together. When I was angry, he was peace, and when he ego, I humility. A co-existance in harmony.

At 60, as we lay in bed, legs tangled, drinking from each other, we seen the lines deeply etched on each other's faces - each line talking about a lifetime lived - of creating a different world for ourselves. Far away from the perverse. A world of constant changem, unbounded love, brimming joy, of creation. And then the momnets of meaningful melancholy where we would together dwell. Everything was, yet nothing had to be. Complete yet infinite. Nothing was spoken, yet nothing was left unsaid. 

We would still stand everyday with open arnms, till death momentarily took us away, only to come together again at another point in time. 

Saakshi sharma

Blasphemous you !

Chants and Prayers and ringing bells
What are these rites and rituals ?
I don’t see God in religion,
Not Sikh or Muslim, Christian.

Incense sticks lit up, of sorts,
But, inside, unholy thoughts?
Treading paths of blind belief,
But turning away from a brother’s grief?

Bowing to saints in saffrons and white,
But another’s pain, your delight?
Tell me is this your crazy faith,
that’ll take you straight to God’s gate.

God is in all shades of green,
In dust, in sand, in seen - unseen.
Not in holy books of any kind,
Within you, your truth, you’ll find.

None will come from up above,
It’s you and me and peace and love.
Heaven and hell’s what you create,
so shun away the pain and hate.

Really there are no needs or should,
Just spread the peace and brotherhood.
Come let’s make broken things - whole,
And touch each other’s heart and soul.

-Saakshi sharma

Maya

Her half drawn veil through which peeped her crimson lips,
Gazing eyes catching glimpses of her sculpted hips.
On her eyes fell reflections of the paling skies,
Laying below the dots of vermilion 'round her brow.

Sat perched on beds of marigold,
hair bejeweled with strings of jasmine,
The whiffs of which in the air condensed.
Her new life stretched in the parting of her head,
'twas all done with the tying of a thread.

Even the clouds beneath her feet were in a celestial dance,
Stars and even the moons had come to take a glance.
Her breath painting the heavens in a plethora of shades,
Burgundies and scarlets, never to fade.

The sounds of the drums pervaded the winds,
Hear ye! Have come the palanquin bearers.
Her aural lights shed a new tone,
She goes, to no longer belong to her father's home !

-Saakshi Sharma

Wonder!

There's music in my soul,
Even the grey's feel whole.
Butterflies on my skin,
Ok 'f I lose or win.

The skies have never been bluer,
This will last I'm sure.
Be running as fast as i can,
Play my game, hold my hand!

With me, all are dance,
It's time to take a chance!
It's time to go away,
Time to fall and play!

Even are crazy the winds,
Hear their word, take a hint.
Go out, lose a bet!
It's just not over yet !!

-Saakshi Sharma

The voices

This hour, this hour so still

Hanging thin in pieces of tranquil

The air dense with the whiffs of untame

The scents will never be the same

Somewhere meanwhile that eerie night

Lay shades between the black and white

Within those shades a bottle broke

From which those spectral voices rose

Skrieks and screams, sounds on a rise,

Muffling out the whispers and sighs.

Blinding those men who could see -

Making them fall to their knee.

They turned up at every nook and bend

Burying things God-sent

Impending doom lingering

A dark soul withering

Like the crumbling smoke

Soaring up from the morgue.

These voices, they will never stop

I go to sleep.  I layoff. 

A little bit more

A little bit more

Waving at strangers, drifting eyes,
Shining like the crimson skies.
Dancing echoes of giggles and laughs
Evanescent - the spells they cast.
Walking lanes with my best allies,
In forever summer warm Julys.

Singing streams, there was warmth galore
Everyday I lived a little bit more.

seeking refuge ‘der golden trees.
All these now just memories.
And now these walls scream out to me
what’s become of you, do you see.
Fallen leaves, empty swings -
chasing after wrong things.

You say you’ll wait until some’s done
Hold on for perfect tomorrow to come.
You leave words still untold
Holding on to hatings old.
From yesterday you may be sore,
But today, just live a little bit more.

So give it up, just give it in.
And feel your soul a tinglin’

Cause love’s been a long time coming
the guitar’s been waiting for a-strumming.
There’s no time left to take it slow
No time for hate no time for woe.
So Everyday live a little bit more
Everyday live a little bit more.

-Saakshi sharma

Be

Crescendo - fall,
I move, I stall.
Turn my back and regress,
need none to impress.

Stand no longer
begging at your door,
the seas are mine,
I embark from the shore.

enough even is, this dimming twilight,
For this ship's cradled by the mellow night.

My sanctuary has arrived.
Love lay there - I free it,
It's meant to go.

I can stop now,
put myself to sleep.
There is nothing left that i seek -
no, not even peace.

The stampede is over,
the lights are moving slower.
As you peek inside, you see -
This sanity is not meant for me.

-Saakshi sharma

Regression

Hither thither I wander...
She may be hidden in hamlets or quarries,
In evil, or lands of the Gods and fairies.
They could be things profane or sublime,
In opium fields or clouds of wine.

Try, will the skies, to stop me?
This delirium.
She's cast on me a spell of limbo.
Spinning things. Vertigo.

The world's conspired to steal her away.
But these drops of heaven
embedded in my soul's eye:
They will help me fine my way.

A forest yonder called me unto.
In, I walk, knowing the infernos will destroy.
But charred I am already
by those flaming within.

In flashes of light, is it you I see?
Exuding divine; Do my eyes betray me ?
Is this in the dark, an impostor vile?
Satan's incarnate; Devil's child?

No. I know that Godless face.
Enslaved, she waited in this place.
Without her, my realities were surreal.
When i free her, i free me!

Numbed. There lingers an odd stupor.
Frozen. Slow motion. My lady, behold her; 
Standing there naked, loveless, no shame -
In these forests i found, my lady with no name.

And in my body she will take refuge.
Not inebriated, this no delude -
For standing there is none, but I !

-Saakshi sharma

Magical Me

Beans and buttons and bubbles and bee
I'm love's embrace and all that glee !
I dance around i'm energy,
Hop along i'm magical me,

Rainbows, sun and smiles and smoke,
pockets empty, always broke,
Water whiskey, Rum and coke,
and full of shit, I'm magical me.

Lemon yellow bubble gum,
I'll be a bitch i'll be your chum,
spin around, come spin with me,
All happiness with magical me.

I'm loud and cute and tiny,
And all things birght and shiny,
So sing this song Doh-Do-Da-Dee 
Starry eyed - Magical Me

Aimlessly lurking around trees,
Jaw dropper- show stopper - My mirror goes JEEZ !
Purple, pink, I'm everything fun,
I'll give you my all, and then some.

Hoppity-hop, come jiggle with me,
I'm outta my mind, Magical me :D

-Saakshi sharma!

Coming back home for christmas

Coming Home For Christmas

Two steps down and he stopped to turn and wave,
There were knots in his throat, his tears would not behave.
He cradles her in his arms, it was time to say goodbye,
She would stand there waiting, he could see it in her eye.

The days went by, she cried herself to sleep,
She thought of her soldier, clinging on to his sleeve.
The tender, that warmth, emanating from his eyes,
Lying under the roof, where they made paradise.

Drops of sunlight, on the snow, they shone.
From her window she'd watch, the path that lead home.
A sound from the wind, the rustle of a leaf,
A giggle from the brook and her heart would leap.

Perched under the willow, she sat and reminisced
Those moments of togetherness, that gentle way he kissed.
Drinking every moment of the night before he left,
Unyielding when they made love in their cozy maisonette.

It all went quiet, they stopped singing - those birds,
Everything seemed faraway - the whispers, those words.
"My soldier, he should have been home yesterday",
Her December was breaking, this could not be God's way.

She sat there cursing the day he had to leave,
She knew he would come back, it was only christmas eve.
Knee deep in muck, those thoughts, they crept,
It wasn't untrue that all night, she wept.

And when finally her heart could take it no more,
There came a messenger at the door.
She heard it, she heard it - will someone make it unsaid?
He won't be coming home for Christmas - Her soldier is dead.

She crumbled, she winced, prayed t'was just a dream,
That she'll wake up tomorrow 't see him walk along the stream.
So she stood under the mistletoe, but he never came,
And it all turned black, things will never be the same.

She wept by herself in those lone hills of cypress,
Her soldier, he'll not be coming back home for Christmas.

-Saakshi Sharma